Wednesday May 24, 2017 10am via Facebook:
When I was 4 years old I lost my virginity to my babysitter’s son. My mother didn’t know that. I hated the color red because of that but that will be in my book. My mother didn’t know that until I became a teenager and she was very sad. I’m sorry I told you when it was too late but I was scared he would hurt my cat. Then I tell you before-year-old being afraid of someone hurting your cat makes me cry at this moment.
I four years old my father left. I never really heard my mom my dad argue but for whatever reason he had to go. I never understood why he had to leave me though. Later my life I was in an abusive relationship where I was raped, mentally abused, spiritually abused, financially abused, emotionally tortured. I blamed my father for this for a long time because in my head I thought if he was there to show me what a man supposed to be and if he was there to show me what I’m supposed to allow and not allow maybe I would’ve never gone through these things.
But I just did an interview with someone I truly adore and in the interview I realized my father was a young father. How can he teach me what he didn’t know?! When I was four and he left I took on that trait of “leaving” and whenever things get hard I leave too. And now at my age I’m going to change that. I can’t blame my father for not teaching me those things he was a young father how could he know ? This is so eye-opening because it’s so easy to place blame on other people but before whatever reason this was supposed to be in my life. I made it! I’m here to inspire and help other people and I’m no longer a victim’s for anyone! Some people are not gonna like the truth in this book I’m writing and it’s going to get very very very deep but it’s coming.
I can’t wait to be on more panels, more conferences so I can share all of these eye-opening experiences with you guys.
YOU ARE NOT YOUR PAIN!